THIS IS NOT A TEST
THIS is a quick note to let you know I haven’t disappeared off the face of the earth. I, along with Kisses & Chaos, will be on a brief hiatus.
Those of you who are part of this, our Chaos Collective™, and come here regularly know about my Mischa and know just how much I love that little furball. He has been there for me through countless moves, breakups, breakdowns, deaths, my fun little romp with cancer, the time someone tried to kill me, my divorce…you get the idea. He has always been the bright shining star in my life. He has always brought me light, love and hope. On my darkest days he is what kept me going. And now it’s my turn to return the favor.
Mischa was acting out of sorts – listless and just…different. The knowing and curious twinkle in his eyes which I have seen every single day for the past fifteen years simply wasn’t there. His luxurious coat seemed dull and he seemed to have lost weight.
I took him to the vet assuming that his thyroid (he has hyperthyroidism) was acting up and that his medicine needed to be tweaked. I asked them to run a blood panel to check his kidneys too…which turned out to be a wise and unfortunate request. Unfortunate because the news was not good…wise because it told us what was really wrong.
Mischa’s thyroid is fine. His medication is working at his current dosage. Unfortunately his kidneys aren’t doing so well. If you don’t have a feline companion then you are likely unaware that kidney issues are very common in cats and once they develop they don’t get better. It is the beginning of the end and, as you can imagine, this is devastating in the truest sense of the word to me.
That being said, Mischa and I are fighters. We are tougher than we look and when it comes to odds we are fond of beating them. Our lives are comprised almost entirely of virtually impossible and most definitely improbable strings of events. In our lives, that which shouldn’t be almost always is.
We were told he would almost certainly not recover from his massive stroke in December of 2011. It was really, really bad. But for 72 hours I was by his side. I did not sleep. I made him stay on my bed (which he was happy to do). I watched over him, cared for him and loved him. I gave him hours and hours of reiki, as I kneeled by his bedside so I could work on him forehead to forehead pouring every ounce of healing and love into him as he closed his eyes and purred.
72 hours later he was 99% (he had and still has a very slight droop to one eyelid that only I notice). His doctor was shocked. Mischa had done the impossible. And that’s what we’re going to try and do with this new risk to his health…we’re going to try and do the impossible. We’re going to try and heal what is, according to veterinary medicine, incurable.
We are currently trying to manage the situation with medicine, vitamins and regular doses of subq fluids (massive injections of fluids under the skin to help flush the kidneys). We are, in the doctors words, “trying to slow the train down.” Mischa could have anywhere from six months to six years. I’m trying to stay hopeful that we can beat this and have another happy, healthy fifteen years together.
So please, bear with me during this difficult period. Right now Mischa is occupying 100% of my attention and time. As soon as he is stable and feeling better I will be back (which will hopefully be very, very, very soon). I will try to post updates to my facebook page to keep you all in the loop.
Prayers, positive thoughts, love, good vibes, healing rituals or whatever your belief system allows (that includes you atheists – physics is beginning to support the long held belief that thoughts can influence reality so feel free to think healing loving thoughts at him) that are sent to him are greatly, GREATLY appreciated. Every drop of love and healing that is sent out to his precious little body helps him, so thank you for any that you can send.
I can’t imagine my life without him. He has been my raison d’etre for almost half of my life. This is indescribably hard for me…especially since he gets upset seeing me upset so even though I want to have a total meltdown and scream and cry, I can’t right now. I have to be strong for him. If I had my way he’d live another sixty years so we could be old and toothless together, sitting on our front porch drinking tea while listening to Glenn Miller, enjoying the rain and each others company. He is my world and it’s killing me to know that our time together may be drawing to a close. But I truly believe that with enough love, prayer and positive healing thoughts that he can overcome this. I have to believe it. I have to.
So thank you in advance for your patience and understanding. I promise I will be back as quickly as possible. I love you all. Thank you.
Tons Of Kisses & Too Much Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick
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