beware-the-horror-of-novocaine-face

 

FUNNY how you never really realize everything you do with your mouth until you can’t really use it anymore.  Case in point?  The aftermath of novocaine.

I had dental work yesterday and it suddenly struck me how truly challenging the most mundane of tasks had become, specifically putting on lip gloss and trying to drink out of a straw.  And when I thought about how much I was struggling with these basic little everyday life things it dawned on me that it must look as insane as it felt.

 

WHEN I LOOKED IN THE MIRROR & TRIED TO PERFORM THESE DAILY RITUALS I REALIZED…I WAS RIGHT…BOY WAS I EVER.

 

My visage, the way my face contorted, was truly a sight to behold.  I realize you have no basis for comparison as, odds are, you have never seen me apply lip gloss or drink from a straw sans Novocaine, but I assure you that this is not how my face usually looks or functions.

But enough of my prattling.  Brace yourselves and…

 

BEWARE THE HORROR OF NOVOCAINE FACE!

 
 

::  NOVOCAINE:  THE AFTERMATH (PARTS I & II)  ::

* email subscribers click the link above to view the video *

 
 

Yup.  I warned you. Can you imagine that sitting across a table from you on a date?  So bad.  *hangs head*  So very bad.  And that was after some of it had worn off.

Can you imagine if I had been able to capture the horror of it all within the first 15 minutes of being out of the dentist chair?  It would have been the stuff of legend…horrible nightmarish legend. (You honestly have no idea how incredibly challenging that was. I literally had to concentrate to make my face do anything even remotely close to what I wanted it to do and THAT was as good as it got.)

 

SO HERE’S MY CALL TO ACTION FOR YOU:

 

The next time you happen to have some dental work done and are suffering from Novocaine Face, I want to see YOUR video.  Film yourself trying to perform an everyday task that requires the involvement of your face and mouth (keep it clean, kids) and share the link with me in the comments.

I don’t care if it’s one hour from now or one year from now, I want to see it.  Hell, I think we all want to see it.  (And it helps us appreciate just how many of the little things we take for granted…never in my life would I imagine putting on my shiny pout would be such an impossible and borderline harrowing experience.)  So please, do it.  Make yourself a mental note, bookmark this page, and do it when you have the chance.

Until next time…

 
 

Lip Impaired Kisses & Lopsided Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

IMAGE  ::  VIA DANLEY DENTAL POSTERS  (YEAH, THAT’S A REAL THING…)  ::

 
 

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CHANGE isn’t most peoples favorite word.  We often associate it with stressful and negative things – divorce; moving; death; getting fired; failure; loss – the list could, literally, be never ending.  But what we forget is that not all change is bad…and that even seemingly negative changes can lead, eventually, to positive outcome.  I think good ol’ Aristotle said it best when he said that is not only inevitable but that…

 

CHANGE CAN BE SWEET

 

CHANGE IS IN ALL THINGS BY SHAAN RAFI

 

We’ve all had changes in our lives that appeared as curses but later turned out to be blessings.  I know one of mine was my divorce.  Heartbreaking though it was (and certainly one of the darker and oddly most enlightening periods of my life) it was honestly for the best, and I could see it as such once I had gained enough distance from the initial trauma.

What changes in your life turned out to be unexpectedly sweet?  Feel free to share them in the comments.  I love hearing other people’s stories (as do other readers) – it reminds us that we’re not alone in our struggles nor in our triumphs…and that’s a beautiful thing.

Until next time…

 
 

Kisses & Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

IMAGE  ::  CHANGE IS SWEET – SHAAN RAFI  ::

 

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Today is a twofer

 

BECAUSE some weeks are a mix of the amazing and the craptacular, today is a twofer. I give you the first ever joint edition of…

Today is a twofer


Today is a twofer


 

As to which are the f*ck yeahs and which are the f*ck its, I’ll leave it to you to decide (though most will be admittedly obvious).  So welcome to my mixed bag, my darling dears.  And feel free to share your own F*ck Yeahs or F*ck Its in the comments below because venting is just as important as spreading love.  And that’s a fact, Jack.  Muwha!

 

Today is a twofer


 

Teddy Roosevelt battling Bigfoot…come on…you know that just made your week.  *  Reconnecting with someone I’ve missed and cared about for years that I never thought I would get to connect with again.  *  Trying something new and really, really liking it.  *  Still getting excited when I think about the return of Twin Peaks…  *

 

Today is a twofer


 

*  …Not to mention the return of Star Wars. (Am I the only one who wants the giant pig dog thing as a pet?  How cute is it?)   *  Mending fences.  *  Rediscovering my love of Constant Comment black tea (to fill in for my impossible to get around here Twinings)  *  Grandma’s birthday.  *  This post about leggings that not only manages to body shame but slut shame…while being completely obnoxious with rudeness guised as humor – a trifecta!  I would love to tell you to read the comments which were rife with shockingly vitriolic body & slut shaming remarks but the author evidently didn’t like the backlash she and her fellow uber-judgmental commenters were receiving and deleted them.  But lucky for you I have one sitting in my inbox…which I will now gladly share.  This comment comes courtesy of one Markus, who seems to have some very clear (and archaic) views on gender roles and who he blames for men being unable to control their wandering eyes and lust issues.  Welcome to 1952, boys and girls. *eye roll*:

 

“…First of all, fashion or not, there is nothing classy about wearing leggings as pants, you might as well just paint your lower half and walk around naked. If you want to find a good guy who will treat you right, wear clothes that makes him want to look at your face when he talks with you. Put down your smart phone and have some hobbies that will create interesting conversation that can capture his attention instead of just your gorgeous body. It’s not secret that women are beautiful, which I appreciate very much; but I don’t want to see your nice curves all the time. I try to keep my mind occupied with clean thoughts and sometimes leggings make that difficult. Ladies, especially if you are married, I ask you to seriously reconsider wearing these things out in public without covering up with something else…. I know, I’ve heard it a million times, “I just want to look good, it’s not about getting the attention of men..” Yeah okay..well guess what, you’re getting it. When I see a ring on your finger I feel bad for you, your husbands, and your children, because I know the kinds of thoughts an comments that a lot of guys make. We live in a society that is tainted with objectification, marriages are disregarded by men on the prowl only looking to satisfy their physical appetites, your daughters are being looked at the same way. I’m only saying this because I still care. These should not be worn as pants alone.”

 

yeah…I warned you.  *  Getting gifts ready for giving.  I seriously love giving presents, more than I like getting them.  I especially love giving handmade and/or really thoughtful, sentimental gifts (I know people cringe at handmade gifts, but mine are f*cking rad).  I just love to make the people I love happy.  *  People who refuse listen to what I’m saying, resulting in repeating myself over and over and over and still they just don’t get it.  Truly migraine inducing sh*t. *  People pissing in my cheerios.  You don’t have to share my excitement, but you don’t have to try and ruin it either.  *  Keira Knightly’s ill conceived topless Photoshop protest failure (which I actually wrote a big ol’ article about but won’t bother posting because artist Molly Crabapple already nailed it…and with far more eloquence and beauty than I had mustered.)  *  The joy of discovering a new book series and the pain of trying to read them slowly to prolong the pleasure (which I am totally failing at despite my best efforts…they’re just so damn good).  *  My beloved Lil Bub, feline extraordinaire, meeting a tiger (and for those who are concerned, the funny stuttering noise the tiger is making is called a chuffle and it’s a sign of affection).  For those unfamiliar with Lil Bub you can find out all about her truly amazing story here.  Have tissues handy.  And just a little bit of random Mischa trivia:  Mischa grew up with baby tigers (along with a baby leopard, baby skunks, baby possums, piglets…but he liked the tigers and leopard the best).  He’s had a very interesting life for a little four legged furball from Texas.  *

 

 
 
 

Kisses & Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 

PS – The Haus of Chaos is having one last holiday sale.  Now through December 14th take $5 off every single item in the shop plus free worldwide shipping.  Just to be clear, that’s not $5 off your order.  It’s $5 off every single item and free worldwide shipping.  That means prints start at $15 (regularly $20), mugs start at $10 (regularly $15)…you get the idea.  So make the geek/art lover/oddball in your life happy with a unique gift designed by yours truly.

 

s6-sale


 
 

IMAGES  ::   TELL THE WORLD TO STOP SPINNING © ALLI WOODS FREDERICK. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.  ::  LOGOS © ALLI WOODS FREDERICK.  ::  TEDDY ROOSEVELT VS. BIGFOOT – SHARPWRITER  ::  VIA WELCOME TO TWIN PEAKS  ::

 

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WORDLESS WEDNESDAY:
WALKING IN A WINTER WONDERLAND

 

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

walking in a winter wonderland

snow-flakes-and-countryside

winter-in-england

walking in a winter wonderland
 
 

Kisses & Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

IMAGES  ::  WINTER BLISS – ALAN HOWE  ::  VIA INSPIRING DISCOVERY  ::  PALACE SWALLOW’S NEST – TIME ZIZIFUS  ::  VIA ESTHER AND JACOB  ::   VIA ADVENTURE JOURNAL  ::  GEFROREN ROSEN – BETH VRUBEL  ::  VIA OK MAG :: SOURCE UNKNOWN  ::  VIA TURBO TWISTER  ::  EVENING SNOWDRIFT AGLOW IN SUNSANDVIK, SWEDEN – CARL FILIP NYSTEDT  ::  VIA MRS. WILSON  ::  VIA HUFFINGTON POST  ::   VIA TOP INSPIRED  ::  VIA GUIDORA  ::  Central park winter – brian tuchalski  ::  WINTER EIFFEL TOWER – PHOTOPIE  ::  CONDICOTE – ANDREW LOCKIE  ::  SNOWFLAKE – ANDREY OSOKIN  ::  A WINTERY VIEW – ALAN  ::  SNOWY NIGHT IN OXFORD – ISISBRIDGE  ::  HILLSBOROUGH PARISH CHURCH AT NIGHT – FLIXELPIX DAVID  ::  VIA BUZZFEED  ::  OXFORD NIGHT SKY DURING WINTER VIA WNDERLST  ::

 

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CONFESSION:  Patience and discipline are two things I struggle with…a lot.  As a free spirit, an admitted magpie who flits from one shiny obsession to the next and one who, if something doesn’t come naturally and easily (and I mean fast) the first time I attempt it, is unlikely to continue to walk down that path.  If I don’t possess a natural aptitude I will walk away.

Some may think the reason for this is because I am a brat or that I’m lazy, but neither is the truth.  The fact of the matter is that I struggle with patience and discipline – always have but I certainly don’t hope I always will.  So I continue to work on these character flaws.  I continue to try and cultivate…

 

PATIENCE AND DISCIPLINE

 

patience and discipline by Xavier Casalta and Rémy Boiré


 

What areas of your life do you want to improve?  What shortcoming are you trying to give the old heave ho to?  I’d love to know.  Share yours in the comments…after all, it’s nice to know we aren’t all alone in our struggles and comforting to know others walk alongside us as we try to kick our less than admirable qualities collective asses.

 
 

Kisses & Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 

PS – This post is a perfect reminder that Leonie Dawson’s 2015 Create Your Amazing Year Calendar & Workbook (both Biz & Life editions) are available now.  These are my go-to guides to letting go of the year past and opening myself to the wonders of the year to come, all while making practical plans and goals for the coming year in a way that’s fun and uplifting (instead of overwhelming, rigid and intimidating).

 

2015 amazing big & life leonie dawson


 

You can get more info from Leonie’s site or you can read my review of my first experience with the 2013 workbook here (and yes, I met about 50% of my goals that year most of which were the real biggies…some of the smaller goals fell by the wayside, but that’s okay.  I rocked 2013 despite all the difficulties I had that year).  If you want to improve your life or business and feel amazing doing it, then this is for you.  Give it a go.  You’ve got nothing lose.

 
 

IMAGE  ::  PATIENCE & DISCIPLINE – XAVIER CASALTA & REMY BOIRE  ::

 

** THIS POST CONTAINS AFFILIATE LINKS. THIS MEANS THAT IF YOU MAKE A PURCHASE USING ONE MY LINKS I RECEIVE A SMALL COMMISSION FOR EACH SALE. THIS IS A FOR PROFIT BLOG AND I OCCASIONALLY INCLUDE AFFILIATE LINKS AND SPONSORSHIPS FOR PRODUCTS AND BRANDS THAT I GENUINELY BELIEVE IN AND/OR PERSONALLY USE. ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED ARE MINE AND MINE ALONE AND ARE IN NO WAY CONTROLLED OR INFLUENCED BY ANY OF THE COMPANIES AND INDIVIDUALS I CHOOSE TO SUPPORT. I BELIEVE IN ETHICAL BUSINESS PRACTICES AND KNOW THAT TRUST BETWEEN YOU AND I IS IRREPLACEABLE – SO KNOW THAT ANY AND ALL PRODUCT RECOMMENDATIONS, PAID OR OTHERWISE, ARE CHOSEN, BY ME, DUE TO MY BELIEF IN THE PRODUCT AND/OR COMPANY. I FELT IT WAS IMPORTANT THAT YOU KNOW THIS BECAUSE I TRUST AND RESPECT YOU. SO THERE YOU GO. TOTAL TRANSPARENCY, MY DEAR…CAUSE I LOVE YOU LIKE THAT. **

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