BY NICKIE SHOBEIRY

 

Meeting with Angels

Shortly before Mischa died I received an email from one of my favorite guest bloggers, Nickie.  Her message (and I’m paraphrasing here):  ‘I have a piece on angels that would be perfect for you.  Interested?’  My response: ‘Of course.’  Little did I know how perfect the timing would be – that two weeks to the day and almost the hour of his death, I would be posting a piece about angels after having lost mine.  Thank you, Mischa, for being my angel. You saved me every single day with your love.  And thank you, Nickie, for your seemingly divine timing (aren’t synchronicities amazing) and, as I have come to expect from your writing, beautiful and thoughtful insights.

 
 

Love is the Key:
Meeting with Angels

Meeting With Angels

 

 

I have a mother who, although not religious, loves angels. Inside our bookshelves were greeting card angels, lovingly cut-out and stuck behind my dad’s hefty dictionaries.  Whenever he wanted a definition, my mother’s angels would peak at him from under dog-eared halos.

I never understood her passion – after all, such beings were meant only for the walls of churches and children’s classrooms.  Skip forward a few years and I was writing for a local art gallery, perusing their exhibitions and feeling mighty sophisticated.  Here, I saw the work of Claire Casely, whose paintings focused on the very topic that had lingered, mostly unnoticed, in the background of my childhood.  Circling the room and taking in Claire’s vibrant, winged creations, I felt strangely comforted. Nonetheless, I simplified it into “good art”, and didn’t bother questioning why one painting…

 

‘LOVE IS THE KEY,’ HAD ME STICKING AROUND FOR LONGER THAN USUAL.

 

Meeting with Angels


 

 

Looking back, it was all pretty idyllic – white walls, sunshine streaming in from the window, this one painting, in all its blues and pinks, sparkling with natural light.  Wrestling with my new-found ambivalence, I hovered over Claire’s business cards before eventually walking out empty-handed.

It’s said that the things that scare us (or in this case, make us so uncomfortable we shred our own cuticles) will come back into our lives again.  For me, this was certainly the case.

 

TWO MONTHS AFTER MY INITIAL RUN-IN WITH ANGELS, I MET ONE PERCHED ON THE FUCHSIA-PINK SOFA OF A CAFÉ.

 

No, I wasn’t hallucinating.  Let me explain: my angel had sweaty palms and a watch that didn’t work.  My angel worried he was rambling and spilled tea on his shoes.  My angel smelled like blue lotus oil and incense, pretended he knew about wine and had handwriting too pretty to read.  My angel didn’t waver when I stepped outside to take a phone call and returned, heavy with bad news and unable to pretend I was anything more than human.

 
 

SOMETIMES, PEOPLE APPEAR IN OUR LIVES FOR ONE GLORIOUS, LESSON-FILLED MOMENT – EVEN IF THOSE LESSONS ARE HARD TO LEARN.

Meeting with Angels


 

 

Especially if those lessons are hard to learn.  Meeting this particular angel taught me about sincerity; there was something about the way he carried his love of the world on his buttoned, paisley sleeve that pushed me into living.  And of course, with push can come fall, and with revelation can come chaos.

Frankly, meeting my angel was a slap in the face.  On the third day of chaos, I stood in my kitchen, sleep-deprived and hyperventilating – for the first time in my life – while on the phone to my cousin.

 

“What the hell is happening?” I gasped, clutching at my shirt.  “Everything’s about to change. Who the hell am I?”

 

Pausing for a second, I looked out the window and strolling by was that angel.  Glancing up, he caught my eye and put a finger to his lips, before stretching his hand to the heavens in a peace symbol.

Naturally, I wanted to throw up.

 
 

Meeting with Angels


 
 

This lesson in living – in sincerity and eccentricity – came to a fever-pitch while on the swings of a nearby park.  My angel swayed gently in all his fur-coat swagger, while I grasped onto my chains, tilting back and letting blood rush to my head.  Dizzy and clearheaded, I began spotting angels in more places than one.  In fact, I found I was surrounded by them, and always had been.

Maybe when we see people in this way, we begin to trust the world a little more.  Maybe we begin seeing its little nudges and greetings.  For me, meeting my slap-in-the-face, blue-lotus-oil angel meant taking heart and truly living.  It meant reaching out to Claire and telling her this story.  It meant loving the people in my life, and recognising the angels both already there, and the angels yet to come.

 

 

Meeting with Angels


 

 

This is to my cousin Mariam, for all of it.  To John, for midnights in the kitchen.  To Katy, for the afternoon rambles.  To Nicky, for her wintertime cigarette breaks (I loved every one).  To Domleo, for driving me to the sea that one time, and to Braidwood for forgiving me for that one year.  To Immy for the coffee, to Charlotte for the phone calls, to Sarah for the essays and to Phen for the quotes.  To Sadie for her spirit.  To the strangers who have learnt to walk slowly.  To Claire for painting ‘Love is the Key’.  To my mother for her cut-out angels, and to my father for his dictionaries.

Beautifully, the list goes on.  You have all been angels.  Thank you.

 
 


 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
NICKIE SHOBEIRY

Author-Pic---Nickie-Shobeiry

 
 

Nickie Shobeiry is a freelance writer living in sleepy old Devon, England. You can find out more about her on her blog, and on Twitter.


 
 
 

IMAGES  ::  LES NEREIDES – THETIS – MAXINE SIMONCELLI  ::  FEATHER © ALLI WOODS FREDERICK ALL RIGHTS RESERVED  ::  ‘LOVE IS THE KEY’ © CLAIRE CASELY ALL RIGHTS RESERVED  ::  CAFÉ SALON NAKA-OKU © CAROL LIN ALL RIGHTS RESERVED  ::  KITCHEN WINDOW; VIEW FROM THE SWINGS © NICKIE SHOBEIRY ALL RIGHTS RESERVED  ::
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A Special Goodbye

** PLEASE NOTE:  THIS VIDEO THAT FOLLOWS WAS VERY HARD FOR ME TO RECORD AND SHARE WITH YOU, BUT I FELT IT WAS IMPORTANT FOR THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE HIM, HIS FAMILY THAT DOESN’T LIVE HERE, TO BE ABLE TO SHARE A FINAL MOMENT WITH HIM AND TO HAVE A CHANCE TO SAY GOODBYE, AS WELL AS THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE COME TO CARE FOR HIM.  HE IS NOT HEALTHY NOR IS HE HAPPY IN THIS VIDEO – HE WAS NOT ONLY IN THE END STAGES OF KIDNEY FAILURE BUT THE STRESS ON HIS BODY THAT SUNDAY WAS CAUSING CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE.  HE WAS IN AGONY…AND HE WAS BRAVE AND LOVING THROUGH THE END.  SO PLEASE REMEMBER HIM AS THE CUTE, ALERT, CHIPPER AND LOVING CHARACTER THAT HE ALWAYS WAS AND NOT AS HE IS IN THIS VIDEO.  REMEMBER THE LIGHT IN HIS EYES THAT BEAMED LOVE TO ALL HE MET.  AND PLEASE CONTINUE TO SEND HIM LOVE AND PEACE AS HE FINDS HIS WAY AROUND HIS NEW HOME WITH HIS BROTHERS AND SISTERS ON THE OTHER SIDE.  THANK YOU. **

 
 
 

A SPECIAL GOODBYE FROM MY ALWAYS BELOVED MISCHA

 

::  MISCHA’S GOODBYE, WITH LOVE  ::

 
 

That video was shot Sunday morning, August 9, 2015.  My sweet baby boy, my best friend of 16 years, my confidant, my baby, my raison d’etre, Mischa, left this world, here in the comfort of our home, Monday morning, August 10, 2015, at 11:30 a.m. CST.   It has taken me a week, to the hour, to be able to write this post.

 
 

MY HEART IS BROKEN.  I AM HUMPTY DUMPTY.

 
 

It goes without saying I am beyond devastated.  I am only able to write this because I am doped to the gills.  (Better living through pharmaceuticals – thank god.)

Mischa was not a pet.  He was not some cute furry thing I bought as a living toy that existed in the background of my life.  He was the center of my life and I was the center of his and…

 
 

WE WOULDN’T HAVE HAD IT ANY OTHER WAY.

A Special Goodbye


 

My ex-husband used to ask me if I had to choose between the two of them which would I choose and I always replied honestly:  Mischa.  Always and forever, Mischa.

 
 

Anyone who had the unique opportunity to witness our friendship first hand for more than a mere five minutes knows that when I say we had a bond that was deeper and more spiritual than you find among the vast majority of humans I am not exaggerating.  These aren’t the embellished words of a grieving heart.

There was (and is) a level of understanding, of knowing, of unconditional love that was transcendent and unique.  I have only had such a connection with one human on this earth that is equal to the bond Mischa and I shared and I cherish it just as much (though it is completely different and one could never replace or heal the other).

Cynics (and I’m guessing atheists and supports of anthropomorphic fallacy as well) will surely say I’m just a sad, lonely woman who was codependent…with her cat *eye roll*, but they would be wrong – we were symbiotic and synergistic.  We were each others compliment, the life of each making the life of the other more beautiful, happy and fulfilling.

 
 

IN LOSING HIM I’VE LOST PART OF MY HEART AND SOUL, AS PART OF ME DWELT IN HIM FROM THE MOMENT WE MET.

A Special Goodbye


 
 

I wasn’t looking for cute that fateful day at the pound.  I didn’t go in search of the prettiest cat.  In fact, I didn’t find or choose him at all.  He chose me and his light, intelligence and inner beauty shone so brightly it made everything else in the room simply fade away.

He chose me and I had no option but to yield and take him into my life, into my heart and into my soul and promise him that I would always be there; that I would always care for him; that he would never want for anything; that he would never be afraid and that I would move heaven and earth to always protect him, keep him happy and make sure he knew every single day that he was loved.

If the zombie apocalypse occurred, he was my top priority – I would always come for him (and often did in my very consistent zombie related nightmares – I know…I’m weird.  It’s a genuine, longstanding fear and it can’t be helped) – always – and he knew it.  He knew all of it.  But that’s how we were.  We always just knew.

 
 

A Special Goodbye


 
 

When he was bed ridden while healing from his stroke and I sat up with him for 72 hours straight (after which he miraculously recovered…seriously…the vet had “never seen anything like it.”  My baby was such a badass) he would merely look at me and I knew if he needed food, water or to be carried over to his litter box.  A look.  That was it.  And he did the same for me…wait…I don’t mean he carried me to the litter box or brought me food…oh, you know what I mean (although the visual of him trying to carry me to his litter box is pretty damn funny).

He has been there for me, taking care of me and providing me support, love, caring and nurturing during the most trying and terrifying times of my life, always without question, without hesitation, without conditions…even when humans who professed to love me had turned their backs and were nowhere to be found.

 
 

FOR EXAMPLE:

When I was recovering from cancer he was there, never leaving my side, snuggled up against me or on me, purring, nuzzling, never getting into my knitting projects and making sure I knew I was loved when my “friends” abandoned me (I had one friend who called to check on me. One. And she’s also the only friend who came by my house to see me and offer help – thank you, Lemons. I love and miss you).

When a batshit crazy asshole was in my home and literally tried to kill me (and almost succeeded), I kept Mischa safe, continually moving him from harms way, protecting him while fighting and fending off our attacker (sometimes successfully, sometimes not) for well over an hour and then some…and the next day when I returned home from the hospital heavily medicated after a fun day of x-rays, scans, poking, prodding and police reports there he was, at the door, waiting for me with his tail up in greeting, chirping sounds of concern that I had never heard before (nor since) and with a look of such sincere worry and depth of love that, to this day, I have never seen matched by human or animal.

 
 

A Special Goodbye


 
 

And again, as I lay in bed recovering from my injuries both physical and psychological he was there glued to my side loving me when, once again, all but one or two of my friends had run for the hills rather than give me hugs or keep me company or, god forbid, pick up the f*cking phone and call.

And when times were good and glorious, we would celebrate our joy and triumphs.

And in return there was nothing, absolutely nothing, I wouldn’t do for him – including staying calm and brave for him as he made his transition from this life to the next, assuring him his pain would be over very soon, that he was going someplace where he would get to see his brother (a massive 100+ pound hair ball of a dog), Lakota, and a host of others I love and trust who have gone before me who would be there to welcome, protect him and love him.

I showered him with love and kisses; lovingly looked him in the eye; smiled (no tears were allowed) and made sure he knew I loved him deeply, profoundly and immensely…that he was my heart and soul and would be missed for the rest of my days, every day.

 
 

A Special Goodbye


 
 

I told him time passes differently where’s he was going and that our next meeting would seem like only moments to him (sadly, it will feel like an eternity for me as I must take the long road), not to be sad and that we would be reunited in no time at all.  I told him I loved him, smiling, as his eyes grew dim and their amazing, beautiful light faded into a dull, heartbreaking flatness.  He was gone.  I hope with all my heart he wasn’t scared and found comfort, peace and love in my words, my voice, my touch and in my eyes which still look for him when I walk in a room or around a corner.

Mischa was my companion, a kindred spirit, one of my spiritual tribe, an old soul, a best friend – loyal, dedicated, trusting, loving, compassionate, brilliant, wise, friendly, outgoing, kind, funny, charming, graceful and poised and always a total goofball who could work his cuteness like nobody’s business.

 
 

HE WAS EVERYTHING TO ME.  HE WAS MY WORLD.

A Special Goodbye


 
 

I hope you will join me in not only mourning his passing, but in celebrating his life.  There will be more posts to come with never shared photos and stories about his life.  There are lights in this world and there are LIGHTS in this world…and he was one of the LIGHTS.  His loving kindness, gentle heart and truly beautiful spirit deserve to be remembered and celebrated. I hope you will join me in doing just that.

Thank you for the love and kindness you have shown him.  Thank you for being his friend.  And thank you for sharing this heartbreaking but sacred moment with us.  You are appreciated and loved…

…And so are you, My Mischa…my sweet baby boy.  You will be loved and missed, forever and always.  Rest in peace, Misch…until we meet again, my precious boy…xox.

 
 

Kitty Headbutts & Sleepy Lap Nap Snuggles,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

::  WE’LL MEET AGAIN – SHE & HIM  ::

 
 

IMAGES  ::  ALL IMAGES © ALLI WOODS FREDERICK.  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.  NO EXCEPTIONS.  USE THESE ANYWHERE FOR ANY REASON AND YOU WILL SUFFER UNIMAGINABLY AS I RAIN PAIN AND MERCILESS HELLFIRE DOWN UPON YOU AND YOU REGRET THE DAY YOU WERE BORN.  FOR REALSIES.  I’M NOT EVEN FUCKING AROUND.  STEAL, SHARE OR USE THESE MOST PRECIOUS OF COPYRIGHTED FAMILY PHOTOS IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM AND I WILL COME FOR YOU LEGALLY, SPIRITUALLY, PSYCHICALLY AND WITH REALLY, REALLY, REALLY MEAN LETTERS THAT WILL MAKE YOU CRY BECAUSE I AM VICIOUS AND BRUTAL WITH MY WORDS WHEN WOUNDED.  IT’S BEST NOT TO BAIT THIS WOUNDED MAMA BEAR, SO DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.  ::
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Heroes And Villains

 

Heroes And Villains

 

 

I was a huge fan of the series Heroes before it went to hell in a hand basket during the writers’ strike that made the best television had to offer unwatchable back in ‘09/’10.  After a calamitous final season the show was cancelled, but now they’re bringing it back as Heroes Reborn *eye roll* (without my favorite characters – I mean really, what’s the point without Peter Petrelli or Sylar?  Exactly).  Overcome with nostalgia (can you be nostalgic over something so recent?  I say yes), I decided to binge watch the series again (long live Netflix).

As I was working on a piece for my next series of photos and listening to Heroes in the background a voice-over/monologue by Mohinder caught my attention.  He was eloquently laying out almost precisely what a dear friend of mine had expressed in a recent magazine interview about his work…how the devil dwells in all of us.  There are no exceptions, merely our decision of whether or not we acknowledge it.

My friend’s words had struck a cord with me when I read them and now, this reiteration from a soon to be rebooted TV series was doing the same:

 
 

HEROES AND VILLAINS

Heroes And Villains


 
 

“Good and bad.  Right and wrong.  Heroes and villains.  And if we’re blessed with wisdom then there are glimpses between the cracks of each where light streams through.  We wait in silence for these times when sense can be made; when meaningless existence comes into focus and our purpose presents itself.  And if we have the strength to be honest then what we find there, staring back at us, is our own reflection bearing witness to the duality of life.  And each one of us is capable of both the dark and the light; of good and evil; of either; of or.  And destiny, while marching ever in our direction, can be rerouted by the choices we make; by the love we hold on to; the promises we keep.”

– Mohinder Suresh, Heroes

 
 

“…EACH ONE OF US IS CAPABLE OF BOTH THE DARK AND THE LIGHT…AND DESTINY CAN BE REROUTED…BY THE LOVE WE HOLD ON TO…”

Heroes And Villains


 
 

I just f*cking love that.  I love it.  I love it because it’s true.  It’s what I try to explain with my tarot readings – very few things in life are set in stone.  You can rewrite your future every second of every day with the choices you make – choices that have the ability to sour the heart and fill it with darkness and cynicism or ones that fill it with love and hope.

And while most of the time we all exist in the grey areas in between – being selfish or altruistic, being kind or cruel, being loving or cold, choosing our happiness or sacrificing it to sadness (or even worse, apathy and resignation that “this is just how things have to be”) – there are important moments, pivotal moments which may seem so small at the time, but if we look closely and make the decision with our hearts we can change our lives, our future and the future of others for the better and all “…by the love we hold on to…”

So move forward today by choosing love.  Don’t let apathy and resignation determine the rest of your life.

 

CHOOSE LOVE.
CHOOSE HAPPINESS.
REROUTE YOUR DESTINY.

 
 

Loving Kisses & Kindness in Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

HEROES AND VILLAINS – THE BEACH BOYS

 
 

IMAGES  ::  HEROES AND VILLIANS – ONCE UPON A TIME  ::  SOURCE UNKNOWN  ::  LIGHT AND DARK – PHOTOFLAKE  ::
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A Blue Moon, Time And Strawberry Soup

A Blue Moon, Time And Strawberry Soup

 
 

Holy crap.  It’s been an eternity since we’ve had an end of the month Postscript so I figure we are looooooong overdue, don’t you?  New to Kisses & Chaos and have no clue what Postscript is?  Well it’s essentially a list of all the various badass bits and bobs that I’ve encountered around this here interweb over the course of the past month and it ranges from the weird to the wonderful.

So if you’re bored at work and itching to take some quick breaks from the tedium (not that I would ever encourage that – oh my, heaven’s no.  I would never ever suggest such a thing, just like I would never dream of streaming Netflix on my phone (that had a kickstand *grin*) while wearing my headphones back when I had a desk job that consisted of doing 9 hours of mindless data entry in DOS (yes DOS…and this was just a few years ago…yeah…exactly).  I would never dream of suggesting you do anything other than be productive.  *eye roll*  – erm – I mean *ahem*) then this list is a perfect way to get a quick fix…on your breaks, of course.  *wink*

So without any more long-winded explanation (like you guys aren’t used to those by now…hahahaha…yeah right) I proudly present the July edition of Postscript:

 
 

A BLUE MOON, TIME AND STRAWBERRY SOUP

A Blue Moon, Time And Strawberry Soup


 
 

*  Tonight is the last blue moon until 2018 (what?!?!) and not only is it unprecedented in all of astrological history, it’s supposed to potentially be a mega-super-ultra-uber life changing one at that.  So if you plan your manifesting and meditations around the moon phases I strongly suggest you read this so you are fully aware of what is in play and what is at stake with tonight’s full moon.

(FYI – for those of you who don’t know, a blue moon is when there are two full moons in one month and I don’t think there’s ever been a year in my life that hasn’t had at least one blue moon so for there to be NONE for all of 2016 and 2017 is just bananas…but then if this one is as powerful as they’re claiming then it’s probably a good thing.)

 

*  And while we’re on the subject of the moon, A Beautiful Mess has a great tutorial on how to make your own clay moon phases garland.

 

*  And while we’re visiting A Beautiful Mess, check out their recipe for chilled strawberry basil soup.  My grandmother used to make this for me (sans the basil) and I loved it.  The perfect soup for a hot summer day.

 
 

A Blue Moon, Time And Strawberry Soup


 
 

My heart breaks for this bride, but this is a perfect example of misplaced anger.  This was basic user error, plain and simple.  The lesson here?  Learn how to use the settings on your camera (yes, even a little point and shoot) before you use it – especially if you’re taking photos of something important.  Sad that she’ll never have those memories documented, but it could have easily been avoided with a little (and I mean a little) effort.

 

*  I’ve long suspected time was a bunch of bullsh*t, but it turns out I might not be crazy…I may be right…time may not actually exist, which would explain soooooo much.

 

*  I wish there were more studies into life after death and the near death experience.  This study is a great step in the right direction.  Science doesn’t understand death any more than it understands birth (They don’t have a clue about what triggers a baby to say “alright…it’s time for me to get the hell out of here…let’s get this party started”). Since birth and death are the only things every person on earth has in common it deserves solid, earnest investigation, don’t you think?

 

*  One of my favorite blogger babes, Sarah (formerly of The Laughing Medusa) has moved and is now rocking it over at SarahStarrs.com.  And this month she is teaching you how to write affirmations that really work (I know I need help with this.  Mine can get rather wordy.  What?  Me?  Noooo…) along with a free workbook (and her new site is amazeballs to boot).

 

*  Feeling creatively flat lately?  I know I have, as I told you a few weeks ago.  Katie over at Skunkboy has 15 prompts to help kick start your creativity.  Sure these are for photography but there’s no reason it can’t be applied to any medium.  So get out your art supplies and get ready to play.

 
 

HAIL TO THE KING, BABY.

A Blue Moon, Time And Strawberry Soup


 
 

*  And finally, what every single Bruce Campbell fan has been asking since Army of Darkness ended its run in the theaters back in 1992 (shit I feel old now):  will there ever be another Evil Dead movie?  (Seriously, at every event I’ve been to where Bruce has had a Q&A this question gets asked Every. Single. Time.  And I don’t blame them.)  Sure we have the Starz mini-series Ash Vs. Evil Dead which comes to small screens in October, but today my beloved Bruce has joked/revealed that the series could very well lead to…MORE EVIL DEAD MOVIES!!!  WOOOOOOOOT!…or at the very least a second season for the series.  Today is officially perfect.  As though the magical blue moon wasn’t enough, we get to top it off with this glorious and gory blood soaked cherry.  F*ck. Yes.

That’s all for now, ladies and gents. See you in August! (And if this blue moon does turn out to be as crazy as the omnipresent “they” are saying then we should all have some interesting stories to share within a few weeks. And yes, I expect you to share. *wink*)

 
 

Blue Moon Kisses & Love-Filled Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

IMAGES  :: VIA IN A NUTSHELL  ::  WAXING. WANING. © ALLI WOODS FREDERICK. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.  ::  © A BEAUTIFUL MESS  ::  UNKNOWN  ::
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The Best of Bob Hope

 

 

Yesterday marked the twelfth anniversary of my beloved Bob Hope’s death, which is a day of mourning and celebration in my home.  No joke.  When I was a massage therapist I didn’t book clients on July 27.  Nope.

Whenever possible the day consists of a Bob Hope movie marathon as I laugh my ass off and then, inevitably, cry because I still feel the sting of the profound loss to this day.  We lost not only an intelligent and highly gifted comedian, but a humanitarian and possibly one of our greatest patriots…and he was born English (go figure).

So this year, in celebration of my first and lifelong crush’s comedic genius, beautiful spirit and long life (he was 100 years old when he died) I give you some of his best quips and quotes with…

 
 

THE BEST OF BOB HOPE:  MASTER OF VAUDEVILLE

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

“I’ve always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.”

“When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness”

“You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

“I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything till noon. That’s when it’s time for my nap.”

“I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.”

“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

“I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.”

“Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning.”

“My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar – I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty-one.”

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

“I’ll tell ‘ya how to stay young: Hang around with older people.”

“She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction.”

“Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.”

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

Of audiences: “They were really tough – they used to tie their tomatoes on the end of a yo-yo, so they could hit you twice”

“I left England when I was four because I found out I could never be King.”

“Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.”

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

“Your ignorance cramps my conversation.”

“People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.”

(When asked where he wanted to be buried) “Surprise me.”

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

I love you, Bob – forever and always.  Thank you for all the laughter and joy you have given me (and countless others) since I was a tiny two year old.  You have been a comfort and, unbeknownst to you, the dearest of friends.  (I doubt you remember but my grandfather was your driver and right hand man while you were on a USO tour in Korea.  Could you tell him I send my love and a martini?  If you have trouble finding him, he’s probably floating in a pool, slathered in baby oil, drinking a bottomless martini and listening to the Rat Pack.)

 
 

The Best of Bob Hope


 
 

I hope wherever you are now the golf courses are always green, you always stay out of the rough and you’re keeping everyone laughing.  You are greatly missed and never forgotten.  Thanks for the memories.

 
 

 
 

Slapstick Kisses & Vaudevillian Chaos,
Alli Woods Frederick

 
 

IMAGES  ::  SOURCES UNKNOWN  ::

 

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